I still carry the images of porn I have seen years ago in my head as clear as these letters I write , as do most of you reading this.
Vivid and animated scenes of rehearsed and regimented motions of staged acts. Unclad, glittering flesh edited and extra-sharpened by motion-picture technology. The flesh of these paid actresses can make any girl seem sexually insecure and physically inadequate!
What with thighs as smooth as velvet and butter, their skin often in a perfect blend of colour, the skin-tone is strikingly uniform; Inner thighs hold no darkened spots or discolouration. Vagina lips aren't discoloured from smooth shave, it just blends with other parts of her skin in an even, unvarying pigmentation.
This is in sharp contrast to the local girls whose buttocks are darker than the skin-tone of their torso, their inner thighs have a darkish hue and the vagina lips are of different brownish pigmentation often with slight rash and bumps from close razor shaving.
And most guys have set a high benchmark and expectation of the body standard from their favourite female porn-star. How many local girls have the dexterity and agility to arch their bodies in an odd position for long, sustained minutes taking in a full penetration with relish ?
There's always the feeling of slight disapointment when a lover stands unclothed and her laps and thighs and boobs fall short of that glittering image of perfection that porn TV has made trite and common.
Little wonder girls feel insecure when guys watch porn. Often these porn stars have giant watermelon breasts that arrogantly defy gravity, hips so wide it can take and bear the sexual frustrations of a dozen men and ass so curvaceous it makes Michelangelo seem a notive at sculpting.
How frequently do males have the impulse to try out a scene on a porn movie? And How often have the local girls cringed away in fright or disgust?
There's never been a craze for heterosexual anal sex at any point in history than when porn made it a fad. Now it has become a legitimate expectation and fantasy most guys want to try out and so few of the ladies are willing to play along.
Just a few girls have I encountered who can match my sexual fantasies with equal fervour and initiate giving head with such eager enthusiasm that makes my mind shut out all sense of sound. But only a fleck in the pool they are.
Men aren't exempt from the feeling of insufficiency that porn seems to evoke. There's always an objectless, lingering and formless fear when your girl is addicted to porn.
The never-ending hours of a single sex scene makes a real man feels like a 2-minute man. The feasting of vaginal secretion and anal tonguing make me feel old fashioned and sexually non-compliant.
Not even mentioning the 12" joystick that makes the most endowed of us look average.
Girls who are accustomed to porn have, with time, come to expect these and more from local guys. Many a girl today crave cunnilinctus, not so many guys are willing to try, in the same way guys yearn for anal sex but so many girls would not yield.
When should the line of dissociation be drawn?
For the breasts of these paid porn actresses are sometimes of silicone implantation, ass might have gone under the modifications of a surgeon's knife.
Body sleight and stamina are drug and money induced. Long sex scenes are often cleverly edited from several short scenes to form a prolonged act of single sex act. And yes, the moaning and groaning are faked atimes with prerecorded audio.
But no amount of logicality and rational rendition will stifle the effect of porn.
You and I will carry those images of immaculately oiled bodies in our heads far into the distance of time.
Every now and again you'll watch a girl go pass you and an image of porn will conjure up....
Swallow the bile, take a deep breath, count to 10 and decide if the image will be re-lived or remain a ghost lurking in the surface of your dark desires