Confronting issues that only brings pain and sadness can be very difficult, it takes a determined mind that is ready and prepared.
If you're trying to deal with issues you want to let go and still get bad results, then i'ts time for counselling or therapy, you can start reading books that will guide you, be it motivational or spiritual books..
A woman once told me how she dealt with the pain she has been carrying for some months and I know it could go a long way for those in doubt..... Every morning she wakes up she sees her joy, her happiness, the person she most cherish, her husband.
She was so glad to have him in her life , her other half, he loves seeing her wake up before he goes to work,and she loved it...
She did not have to worry ,because worry is the interest you pay on a debt you may not owe, she just enjoyed every moment .she loves him so much and he loves her too.
But, on this very day ,she woke up and he was not in front of her like he use to, he wasn't there to give her a kiss, his smile and words of affirmation
She wondered where he'd gone to, she looked for him everywhere in the house and still didn't find him, she shouted and screamed his name to know if he's hiding.she cried so silently, calling his name a million times. She didn't even realise that she was crying.
It dawned on her that he's no longer with her physically, he had left her for about three months. She's being in pain all alone, he's gone to a better place where he will meet the heavenly father...it was like she was sinking deep into an ocean and needed to grasp for breath.
She didn't know what she must have done wrong to go through this ..you know "it is ironic how your comfort zone can be so tiring".
She never did anything well, she cried at every little thing, she was in a total mess. friends, family and colleagues tried to get her back her feet.
It is so painful to know that what gives you so much joy, happiness has now become a misery.
A colleague at work gave her a tape that contains a motivational message, she never had any interest at first but when she listened to it, she knew some things has to be.
She hasn't dealt with the loss, was still living in misery, but then she had to accept what life brought, she tried doing it her self, it didn't work then she finally went for therapy ...
Therapy doesn't mean she won't have the memories, the memory would linger in the heart but now the stronger version would surface, like remembering the good days...
Therapy saved her because she was ready to let go, coupled with family that stood by her all through the years... It was extremely difficult for her but she needed to deal with the situation.
It could be discouraging at first when you want to tackle it, but all you need to do is to be strong to face it and it will become a story you tell.
Related: DEAL WITH IT (Part 1)