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Dating and Relationship: Things you should know about Northern Ladies

Dating and Relationship: Things you should know about Northern Ladies
Credit: Hausa Ladies

When it comes to dating or having  relationship with any African lady, most especially, in this case, Northern Nigeria Ladies, one thing you must never miss before saying ‘hi’ is their cultural background.

 

In an article released by  Republican Nigeria , which has drawn attention as per things many do not know about Northern Nigerian Ladies, many have said they never actually observed this and have promised to confirm for themselves as time goes on.

Dating and Relationship: Things you should know about Northern Ladies

The Hausa are the largest ethnic group in sub-Saharan Africa with the second most spoken language after Arabic in the Afro-Asiatic language family. The traditional dress of the Hausa consists of loose flowing gowns and trousers. The gowns have wide openings on both sides for ventilation. The trousers are loose at the top and center, but rather tight around the legs. Leather sandals and turbans are also typical. The men are easily recognizable because of their elaborate dress which is a large flowing gown known as Babban riga also known by various other names due to adaptation by many ethnic groups neighboring the Hausa.

 

 


While the women can be identified by wrappers called zani, made with colorful cloth atampa, accompanied by a matching blouse, head tie and shawl, known as hijab. They fancy the use of jewelries and ornaments and are also known to engage in the practice of painting of their bodies using lalli and henna paintings.

Dating and Relationship: Things you should know about Northern Ladies

Hausa is considered one of the world’s major languages, and it has widespread use in a number of countries of Africa.

 

Now focus, here are the things you need to know about these Northern Ladies.

 

–  Every suitor is Welcome
In the North, having two or more boyfriends isn’t a crime for ladies. In fact, having just one shows you aren’t attractive. Northern ladies love to have the attention of men, having attention of different men shows that they have arrive.
So for any guy willing to take a shot, be ready for competition.

 

–  Your rival knows you
The Northern ladies don’t play hide and seek game with men. When you approach them, they will tell you openly there is someone before you, if the first traditional marriage rite is yet to take place there is no assurance of marriage so you can join the race. She will encourage you to fight for her especially if she likes you. So it is survival of the fittest.

 

 


–  They set you on competition
to them you can’t be hungry and want to feed another. So you and your rivals are in for serious competition. For any family occasion or annual festivals, your gift will be compare and contrast among all the suitors or boyfriends. The suitor with more naira power will mostly win the race unless on few occasion that are uncommon.

 

–  Survival of the fittest

Love comes with money. They review your financial power and spending power because it’s not just about having it but the willingness to spend it. So if you can’t spend, you may not win and you can even be drop quickly from the race. If you are not ready to spend kindly look for the exit door.

Dating and Relationship: Things you should know about Northern Ladies

–  You live for them
95% of Northern ladies are economically dependent, the culture and tradition encourage this. From birth, their fathers take care of all their needs up to the first three months of their marriage. Thereafter the husband take over till death. So you live to satisfy them on and off the other room.

 

–  You do the visit
Northern Ladies hardly visit unless on few occasion and that must have been after the first marriage rite, so during courtship you do the visit and you don’t go with empty hand. They can hardly be of any domestic help to you while in courtship if you are sick or not.
Having a Northern girlfriend is just a less a step from been a single guy.

 

–  Kolanut and the visit

If you can endure to this level you are a step closer to been a husband. It is the duty of your family to pay this traditional visit to the house of the Lady with Kolanut, sweet and few other things. This is the formal declaration of interest and not many get to this level. Once the family of the Lady accept you and welcome your family then the door is close to all other rivals.

 

 


–  The Big Box
Once the first traditional rite is over the next thing is the Big Box, it is called “LEFE” as an intending husband you are requested by tradition not religion to get a complete set of Big Box and fill it with clothes, jeweleries, shoes, bags, make-up kits, wrist watches and lots of other female items you can image and take it to the lady’s house. It will be display for days, in both the intending bride and groom house for well wishers and immediate family to see and pray. After this, the date for the D-Day is set.

–  The D-Day
Preparation for marriage is more stressful in the north than the wedding day itself. The wedding fatia don’t take more than 10mins. You may or may not entertain any guest. Even the entertainment, if any, is always reserved for close friends and immediate family in an unannounced location. And to complement the husband the wife come with assorted furniture and others house utilities, the husband except on few occasion don’t furniture the house the bride and her family does.

 

 


–  Divorce

As beautiful as they are while in courtship is as ugly as they can be after marriage because the tradition did not give room for both of them to form any bond through activities outside the deceptive night visit by the male, while in courtship they barely know each other so well, so many minor issues often lead to divorce. Most time the cause of the divorce is always embarrassing to the ear.

Dating and Relationship: Things you should know about Northern Ladies
Dating and Relationship: Things you should know about Northern Ladies

So, when you decide to shoot your shot with any northern lady, just know you are not alone and know it is unique and different from Beyonce and Rihanna situation. Its just different and requires patience if thats where your honey is….

FADAKA LOUIS
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