The 10 Things Men Can Do To Eradicate Gender Based Violence

Dear Men, here are Ten (10) things you can do to eradicate Gender Based Violence.

1. No Means No
Once a woman says “No”, take it like the gospel. Give up your pursuit and advances right there and there. Don’t negotiate. Accept!

2. Let Go of Entitlement
Buying gifts or supporting a woman financially doesn’t mean you have a G*d given right to her body. So rather ask and receive. If you buying her six savannahs means six rounds of sex for you, tell her before she gulps down the first one. Make intentions clear so there’s consent.

3. Say No To Sexual Harassment
Sometime what we, as men, think is amusement is harassment to women. Sexually objectifying women with nasty remarks and touching women without their permission is wrong. We have to stop it.

4. Desist from Perpetuating Rape Culture
Our society has instilled a rape culture in us and we have accepted it as normal way of doing things. There’s a need to uninstall and unlearn rapey tendencies that we embraced consciously or unconsciously.

5. Call Other Men To Order
It should be a thing of the past that our brothers, friends and uncles boast about their violent tendencies against women in our presence. We can’t encourage wrongs. Violence against women should be condemned in words and actions. We should be the ones opening cases against fellow brothers.

6. Walk Away
When a woman wrongs you, avoid things escalating to violent levels. If clashes between you and her continue unabated, it’s better walk away. Walk away – cut ties. Imagine ending up in jail for killing a toxic person. Never let anger drive you to inhumane levels. There’s plenty of women out there, don’t let one mess you up.

7. Treat Women With Respect
Assume every woman is your sister, mother or daughter. I assume you wouldn’t want to hurt or harm any woman in your life. You can’t kill or rape your mother right. So treat all women with respect.

8. Mentor Young Men
Most men were taught wrong things by the previous generations. We adopted bad things from the men in our lives. If we can be taught wrong, we can damage the cycle of violence against women by teaching our young men better ways of handling women.

9. Seek Help
It’s sad that most men are broken but reluctant to seek help. The highest number of suicides in the world today is men. Depression, stress, anger and all feelings of inadequacy are destroying men today. The violence that men dish out against women is a result of something wrong with men. Unfortunately men think it’s weak to consult counselors, psychologists and therapists. Any abuse towards women is a sign of weakness. Prevention is better than cure. Look for help.

10. It’s Never Too Late
Most of us, men, have the power to change the narrative. The issue of violence against women can drastically plummet down and ultimately be out if we take a stand. Everyman is a potential perpetrator. Actually we all are perpetrators. By knowing and doing nothing, we are complicit to the crimes. It’s about time we take a stand. Violence against women will end the day all men take responsibility and accountability. Beating a woman is not discipline, it’s abuse. If you are a perpetrator, stop!

NB: As society, men and women, we have a chance and responsibility to restore the dignity of men and women by abandoning the inhumane ways of living and instilling values that make us a better people.