THE Pre-Wedding Pictures! This is one of those topics I sometimes feel reluctant to talk about were it not for the fact that admonitions are to be made even if no one wishes to listen. For many in this*time of ours, even if you preach against pre-wedding pictures a million times, their mind is made up to place satisfying people over correctness, religious and logical correctness. Otherwise you will want to wonder how it makes sense for two people who aren’t married to go assume ridiculous poses, take pictures of it and share it to the world. The only thing that makes sense about pre-wedding pictures is that people have come to feel comfortable doing it simply because majority do it.
It becomes even more ridiculous when Muslims, sometimes even supposed conscious Muslims engage in this act of taking pictures with their prospective spouses and spreading the picture to the world to feast their eyes on. There is so much wrong with pre-wedding pictures:
- About-to-be-married doesn’t come any close to being married. The first mistake people make is giving a special status to those they are getting married to in lieu of Islamic restrictions. For some contorted excuses in people’s minds, what they wouldn’t do with a strange woman, they will do it with the person they are about to get married to. Shaitan has exploited such cracks in many intending couples predisposing them to disobey Allāh without guilt or thinking there is a need to seek forgiveness and repent. Nobody is your wife or Husband till they legally become your wife or husband! That means you are expected to lower your gaze and avoid seclusion with them, and restrict for yourselves what is restricted between non mahrams. The special status shaitaan inspires you to create are usually at the* expense of the pleasure of your Lord whose blessing you seek in the union.
- Pre-wedding pictures will almost always involve tabarruj. Tabarruj is the wanton display by a woman, in the presence of non-mahram men, her beauty and beautifications, which Allāh prohibited in the Qur’an.
…و لا تبرجن تبرح الجاهلية الأولى..
“….and do not display yourselves (women) like that of the times of ignorance….” Q 33:33.
Indeed ‘tabarruj’ which has become widespread and taken as a norm is a practice of the period of ignorance found among ignorant and disbelieving women. It is painful to see our muslim sisters embracing it in droves, may Allāh rectify our affairs and theirs. Pre-wedding pictures is typically a documentation of tabarruj. Even if Allāh makes it easy for you to become remorseful enough to seek repentance from it, there is no telling how many phones already have the pictures of you displaying your adornment. The only option left is to keep doing istigfaar as much as you can hoping they will be sufficient. It is the same for people who display their adornments on social media handles, may Allāh increase us all in understanding and piety.
- A man who finds nothing wrong in his wife displaying her adornments to the world will most likely end up a cuckold (Dayyouth). A cuckold is a man who has no protective jealousy over his wife. He knows she is leaving his house displaying her adornments and mixing freely and dangerously with non mahram men but is ok with it. Such a man lacks protective jealousy. This is the same with men who display ravishing pictures of their wives om social media on the excuse of celebrating them perhaps on their birthdays and other events.
A man who sees nothing wrong in pre-wedding pictures will likely end up negligent and careless of the spiritual affairs of his wife, thus permitting immorality in his house thinking that’s civilisation. Wallāhi this deen of ours is not practiced based on public acceptance. Wrong is wrong whether or not you agree with it, or whether or not the public agrees with it. Allāh will question the husbands of all these married women involved in wanton display of their beauty in public both in the real world and on social media the way He wil question the fathers of unmarried ladies.
If you have allowed tabarruj before marriage, on what grounds will you prevent it after?
Cuckoldry is a major sin, because of the report narrated by imam Al-Nasaa’i from ‘Abd-Allah ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) who said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “There are three at whom Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, will not look on the Day of Resurrection: the one who is defiant towards his parents, the woman who imitates men, and the cuckold.”
Website Designing/Management/Social Media – Iyanu Victor
For those who are still single or about to get married you need to ask yourself if you really wish to start your journey into marriage in disobedience to Allāh? Will you then wonder if tomorrow the marriage seems devoid of Allāh’s bārakah?
May Allāh grant us understanding.