From the beginning of time, we have been made to believe that a woman’s virginity is her most prized possession. It is seen as a worthy quality and a prerequisite for a good “wife material”.

This is a controversial topic because you really can’t tell that a woman is a virgin. It goes way beyond breaking of the hymen.

Would you call a female who has been having anal sex, yet has never had vaginal sex, a virgin? Or a female who has been having oral sex with her partner a virgin? I think not. Besides, virginity can be lost through other means that are not sexual.

Still, I wonder why virginity is such an issue with regards to females only and not males?

It is an irony that the same virginity issue has caused the collapse of some marriages because the woman was termed sexually boring and inactive.

Some women have been judged unworthy and unserious because of their “body count”. While their male counterparts are celebrated for the same reason. It is time we have an unschooling and reorientation.

Here are some reasons why men crave virgins:

• Most men like virgins because of the title of being the “first”.
• Men don’t like to think that their partners have had other lovers before them so they seek out virgins with the assumption that they haven’t “been” with any man.
• Another reason why men seek out virgins is to protect themselves from Sexually Transmitted Diseases.
• Some men are intimidated by sexually experienced women.

Men generally like the idea of getting married to a seemingly “good girl”. Yet they keep seeking the “bad girl” outside the confines of their marriage.

Let’s look at some reasons why men would prefer an experienced lover:

• Experienced women are usually more confident and know what they want. Inexperienced women may have a hard time expressing what they want or they just don’t know what works for them.

• An experienced woman isn’t shy about asking for what she wants and making sure she prioritises her pleasure. She takes initiative and doesn’t just wait for things to be done to her. Inexperienced women on the other hand tend to make physical expectations of the man. They mostly expect the man to lead, so they just lie there and expect the man to do all the work.

• A sexually experienced woman can joke about it when something goes wrong. She is also able to bring ideas to make the experience more satisfying.

This is not to say there aren’t inexperienced women who turn out to be great lovers, just the same way that body count does not determine how good a lover the woman is.

However, experience comes from the quality of the sex one has had, and not the number of partners.

Lastly, it is important to understand that a person’s value should be judged by their brain and not the state of their vagina.

So, which would you prefer?

Tiwa Says